My Past Memories Is Making Me Hate Her And I Want To End It Now

Posted by E.L.E.X on July 22 2020 under Motivational

She has been mounting pressure on me to follow her to meet her parents. We have been in this relationship for a year now. Although she is not the only one I am dating. I am not sure of the other lady, but at least this one is ready to marry me.

I am not sure if I genuinely love her or not, but a part of me loves her. A part of me wants to treat her bad, whenever I remember what she did to me in the past.

3 years ago, I started noticing and showing interest in her being my junior sister’s friend. I discussed with my sister who encouraged me to approach her that she had no boyfriend. We were on talking terms before which was an opportunity. So I leveraged on that to get closer to her.

When she noticed I was getting closer, she started giving me attitudes, stopped talking to me. Finally, she stopped coming to our house. She would give my sister thousands of excuses why she was not chanced to come to our house.

We met at a friends’ birthday party, to my surprise, she warmed up to me, greeted me. I thought she must have repented. While the party was on, I asked her to come to my table and sometimes spend with me, she said “ok”. I waited for hours, she didn’t come.

I later saw her in the room with the celebrant. I jokingly said to her “You dey whine me abi”. She just went off, started ranting, she said I should say whatever I want to say now infront of everyone..infront of her friends. “Why do you want me to come and sit with you?” say it now “let the whole world hear”. It was so embarrassing for me. I just said to myself “whats there..are they not aldult?..dem never toast all of them before”.

My sister was there, got angry and left us. She had already warned me to leave her alone. That I am interfering with their friendship. On my birthday, she replied to my whatsapp pictures with love and kiss icons. She went to facebook to like all my birthday pix.

Facebook was alerting me as she was clicking. She finally sent me happy birthday..where is my cake..we started gisting again. She apologized for what she did that day, that she was not in a good mood that day (someone who met, joked and laugh with me, even agreed to come sit with me on my table).

We continued chattin for weeks, I made sure I didn’t get intimate with her. One day, my sister was playing with my phone, then saw our chats, read through our chats. She was mad at me. She confronted me and nearly slapped her for disrespect.

She later calms down and explain to me that if I knew what this girl said about me on group chat, that I would shoot her if I have a gun. She said she didn’t tell me so that I won’t feel bad.

She then shows me their caucaus group chat discussing me. Tears were just coming out of my eyes. I felt cold. They were just laughing at me. My sister was just fighting for me shutting them off.

This lady said “how come some men behave like he-goat. Why can’t he leave me alone?” “am I the only girl on the planet? Oh God I hate that idiot.” “Gosh, I can never be close to such person talkless of dating him” ANOTHER girl said “That’s how those guys are…you need to disgrace him more next time he try something stupid with you. Blahblah.

That’s when I closed her chapter. Blocked her on facebook, whatsapp, instagram. I moved on. My sister did photoshoot for her birthday and some of her friends came. I saw her and just greeted her, minding my business.

Then I was dating another girl then, so it’s a win-win for all. She stayed behind, when everyone left, she asked my sister to help her beg me.

She knelt infront of me started telling me “she was sorry..she was being childish”

This was someone that was in her 24 when I was chasing her. I said I forgave due to pressure from my sister. Since then, she will come to my apartment, do my laundary, cook soup inside my freezer. When she is coming from work, she will branch at my place to prepare food on my table. At times she offered to sleep overbite, that she cooked till late in the night, which I will refuse.

But one thing led to another, one day, we had sex. And that changed everything.

I couldn’t resist her again. But a part of me still hates her whenever I remember those disgraceful moments. Now she is 26, she want us get married. If I marry her, I may treat her bad.

In a dilema seriously and it’s giving me headache.